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Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back

How to Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back if He Broke Up with You

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There are numerous variants of how exactly a relationship can end. Sometimes it’s proactive, sometimes it’s due to a single event, and sometimes it just gradually falls apart. One of the more regularly occurring ways a break up happens, is that the man dumps his girlfriend. Giving either no excuse or reasoning, and/or some lame reason, that doesn’t sound very believable.

When your now ex-boyfriend leaves you, it’s a bitter pill to swallow, and can indeed hurt like hell for a long time. Even with all of this emotional tumult, there can still be that thought that creeps into your mind about getting back together with him.

Then another question arises, “Can I even get him back, if he broke up with me?”

Well, yes, at least in some cases. However, there are even more questions that need to be answered before pursuing such a project. Such as, is it really what I want or is it even likely to succeed in my individual case?

In this post, I want to go a little bit deeper into this topic and what needs to be considered when trying to get back an ex-boyfriend who dumped you.

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Getting One’s Mind Clear

In my eyes, the first step of trying to reconcile with someone after a break up is to truly decide that it is something worth pursuing.

Listen, it’s not always an easy process to get back together with an ex-boyfriend, and it can definitely take some time to pull off.

As such, one has to be sure that this is truly what they want in their lives, and not just act out of the pure raw emotion that stems from a break up.

There is a lot of pain and loneliness that comes along after a relationship ends. A lot of it has to do with the addictive qualities of love and companionship.

It hurts because one expects that person to be around, we’ve conditioned ourselves for it, and when it doesn’t happen…it doesn’t feel good.

The thing of it is, this feeling can still be found within you, even if you weren’t 100% compatible with someone. I’ve gotten dumped by girls before, been completely torn up about it for months, only to later on realize how truly lucky I was to get out of that relationship.

None of those ladies would’ve been the right fit for me on a long-term basis. BUT it still hurt really bad when it happened.

That’s one of the reasons that the No Contact Rule after a break up is so effective and important, it provides clarity.

With enough time apart, the emotions can subside, to the point where you can make a rational choice about what exactly it is you want in your life. Sometimes, you find out that he isn’t it and other times you can figure out that reconciliation is something that is worth attempting.

Take the time for yourself and truly analyze what it is that you want from your life. What direction would you like to take it? What kind of relationship, do you want at this point in time? Do you even want a relationship at all?

Things to Ponder About the Relationship

What were some of the causes that ended the relationship? How did things end up going from complete romance to utter failure? Since he initiated it, you might not know his exact reasoning, but you can surely think about some potential flaws or problems that the relationship had.

Did you cheat on him? In that scenario, for instance, it is obviously going to be more difficult to lure him back than if no infidelity took place. If you did cheat, ask yourself, why? Were you bored or dissatisfied with him? With your life? Or do you actually want to explore other options. Be honest with yourself and don’t judge your conclusions so harshly.

Was the end of the relationship caused by him cheating or the presence of another woman? In that case, the best course of action is to move on with your life, and not try to repair things with someone who clearly doesn’t want to be involved all that much in the confines of that previous relationship.

pondering alone

The amount of time that has passed since the end of the relationship is also a factor. If he broke up with you many months ago or even over a year ago, it’s probably time to let it go. Now, this doesn’t mean that it’s impossible to fix things eventually…just a lot less likely.

Then, there is the question of what type of relationship it was and how serious did it get? Of course the odds of reconciliation are going to be effected by the individual person who is being dealt with but also something like age can also be a factor.

For instance, someone reading this who is coming off of a high school or college break up, is generally going to be in a much different place than an older person, who may have been involved in marriage talk.

Go No Contact

The No Contact period can be an important step to take during this process. Not only does it give you the time to think properly about what you want and to heal. It also, creates a certain distance, to where you aren’t texting or begging the ex to come back.

You don’t want to get caught in a spot, where you cannot control yourself and, you just pester him about getting back together. It’s ultimately an unattractive quality, and the point is, to re-attract the ex.

This time apart also gives him the ability to be clear about what he wants moving forward, without any interference. Think about it. If one keeps talking to their ex-boyfriend, he never has time to miss you, but he does have plenty of time to be annoyed.

The No Contact Rule is usually in effect for 30-45 days. However, it can go as short as three weeks, to as long as two full months. This is usually sufficient enough to make progress towards finding out, whether or not, a relationship will be salvageable.

This period of time should be used to heal emotionally, improve yourself, your life, and to consider how to fix the issues that caused the relationship to fail. Again, one may discover that, it cannot be fixed. That’s fine, most relationships, are not meant to be in the long-term.

Re-Establish Communication

After at least, 3-4 weeks of No Contact. The opportunities to begin to talk to an ex again, will begin to arise. In some cases, the boyfriend, may reach out first. Yes, even when he was the one who initiated the break up.

On your end, you’ve had plenty of time to reconsider, whether or not, you actually want to try to get back together. Or if you’re better served, by moving on entirely from this broken relationship.

Of course, not all of the problems of the relationship are solved, at this point. But there has been enough time apart, to cool down, and think fairly clearly about the future prospects.

If you’re still in the mindset, that reconciliation is the goal. You can then, reach out to the ex-boyfriend, to feel out whether it is a possibility or not.

What’s the first move?

To re-establish contact with an ex, the best opening move has to include the right form of communication. Not just having the best message or line. Phone calls and face to face meetings can be really hard to pull off, especially if the other person doesn’t want to talk.

Luckily, text messaging exists nowadays. This is an advantage, because it takes so much pressure off of things, and is a pretty passive form of communication. Which means, it’s way less intrusive and annoying. We want to gently work our way back into a dialogue, with the ex, in order to move things forward.

Think about it:

  • They don’t have to agree to meet you face to face right away.
  • That message can sit on their phone until they are ready to respond. More time equals a greater chance.
  • You can craft the right message to them.
  • It’s a private and personal way of communication.

Here is relationship expert Michael Fiore. explaining texts as a form of communication for relationships:

Hopefully, you took the opportunity to download the two free reports towards the top of the post, which explains some very basic things not to text your ex and provides a simple roadmap, of this program’s process. Both of which were written by Mr. Fiore as an introduction to his “Text Your Ex Back”.

Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of shows including Rachel Ray’s to discuss his methods for romance.

Here is what some of Text Your Ex Back’s users had to say about their success with the program:

“Not only did this program change my relationship with what i feel is the most incredible and unique girl i have met so far in my life, but you actually helped me change my life for the better. Ever thought this could be a life changing event for someone? Not to mention how inexpensive and how user friendly the program is, no amount of money or words could express how truly grateful i am for what you have done for me as a man. And for that i would just like to say…Thank You!”- Matthew R.

“My ex was almost begging me to take him back” I love your program ! It’s so much worth it !! My ex came to me yesterday and was almost begging me to take him back !!! Just as you said it !! :D Thank you Michael !!!

“Hi Mike. Good program. The 30 days of no contact was crucial – helped work through myself, thoughts and feelings and work on my physical side – mind body and spirit. The “I like myself” exercise is extremely insightful as it reminds ourselves of who we are. My ex and I are giving at another go – small steps but all great journeys start with small steps. Talk was the game opener – being in our 50’s we did more talking face to face than texting but adapted some of the principles in this program. Thanks for helping me find myself first so I could have the opportunity to find my ex.”- Paul

If you are serious about wanting to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee:

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Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back

Chances of Getting My Ex-Boyfriend Back?

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The break up happened and after some amount of time an idea will start to creep into one’s mind saying, “Can we get back together with him?” The hamster wheel begins spinning furiously. It’s trying to figure out, if the chances of getting an ex-boyfriend back, are still good or if they are seemingly beyond any hope.

When looking into this sort of thing, understand that there is no exact way to truly measure the odds of successfully fixing a broken relationship. There are too many variables at play in each person’s unique circumstance. However, there are certain signs which point more strongly to one direction versus the other.

With that in mind, I thought that I’d go over some of the considerations that should be looked at, which can give an indication of how good one’s odds of getting an ex-boyfriend back are. Again, nothing is a 100% certainty but there are repetitive themes within human relationships, that can improve or ruin these chances.

Who Started It?

Which person in the relationship, ended the relationship? If you did and are now beginning to regret the decision, your odds will be better in most cases.

It is easier to get someone back after you break up with them, as they often weren’t expecting it, and probably didn’t want the relationship to be over. Now, that’s not always the case, especially if there was something about the break up that particularly devastated them.

If he was the one who initiated the break up, it’s a much tougher hill to climb because his motives for doing so will come into play. Maybe he wasn’t ready to be serious or wants to go in another direction with his life.

Those sorts of things can completely throw off reconciliation plans and can be tough to navigate. Though, I believe that women usually have an exit strategy in place when they break up (in terms of having other guys available to them) than do men when the dump somebody.

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If it was a mutual decision, then, it’s kind of muddy and could go either way with about equal odds. Again, it will all depend on the unique variables of your relationship.

While this can be a big piece of the puzzle, it isn’t the end all, be all. Lots of break ups can happen on an impulse. So, he might have dumped you, and then later realized he made a mistake.

Plus, people can just change their minds, once they’ve experience what life and that dating world is like post-breakup. Then, it becomes clear what they’ve given up.

How Long was the Relationship?

Time spent within a relationship can have a huge effect, as to whether or not someone is willing to move on.

Dating for a few months, it’s a lot easier to cut ties with someone.

Dating for years? That’s a tough one to get past. Even when you’re mad, at the other person, it’s still a situation nobody wants to leave frivolously.

So, the longer the relationship lasted, usually the better odds that someone has at a reconciliation. Those emotional bonds are too strong.

However, there still are the cases in which, the ex-boyfriend is just so completely tired of dealing with the woman and relationship. Everyone has a breaking point, or at least where they no longer see a future, with their current partner.

What Did He Want?

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One common cause of break ups is differing relationship goals. A person may not currently be on the same page as their partner in terms of what they want from their dating life.

He may want to play the field, while you may want to be in a committed relationship, that has a path forward into the future.

There are also times when there is great confusion as to what he wants. He may like aspects of the relationship but may be feeling drawn elsewhere. Ultimately, if the man doesn’t feel that his ex-girlfriend fits into his plans, it is much more difficult to convince him otherwise.

There is also the reverse situation, where he wanted to be committed, and you were the one full of uncertainty. In this scenario, it is much easier to get back together, as you’d just have to be willing to get serious about things.

However, I would still say that you’d really make sure that is what you actually want and not just string him along, while still wanting to live the life of a single woman. Don’t force a major change into your life, just because you currently feel bad.

His own internal inclinations, as to what he wants from his life currently and from his dating life in particular, will go a long way to determining the odds of reconciliation.

This one can be a bit hard to figure out at times, as some guys won’t always express what they want, or even know exactly themselves.

What Were The Underlying Causes?

Some relationships merely need minor fixes in order to function well again. Others, are completely broken on a very fundamental level. Trust may be non-existent, fighting may be all too often, and the sight of the other person may be too much for one party to handle.

The causes of the break up can have a huge impact on the odds. For instance, if you were caught cheating or severely abusing his trust, then it is going to be remarkably hard to regain his trust to the level that it needs to be within a relationship.

In most of those cases, the best decision is probably to move on, work out your personal issues, and give a go at a relationship with someone else down the line.

If it was something such as fighting or arguing all of the time. Ask yourself, how is this issue going to be solved if a new relationship is formed with one another? Things won’t just magically be better the second time around, the old relationship’s problems need to be addressed.

Relationship Status

Are you seeing any one else now? Is he? How serious are either of your dating lives? Now, if the break up was really recent, this might not be an issue. However, if the break up occurred months ago, than it almost certainly is a factor.

The longer the time apart and the more the other person has started dating or being involved in exclusive types of relationships…the longer the odds will be that he will get back together. People tend to grow apart with time and the conditions that once made the relationship work out well are no longer there.

Did You Burn Bridges?

While it is common for people to be angry at one another, after a break up. There are things that some folks do, that goes way above and beyond, just being a bit mean.

If you did or said anything particularly egregious towards him, since you’ve broken up, that can also be a big negative.

Communications

What is the current level of communication? Are you guys still talking a lot or is it completely shut off? Has he blocked you on social media?

If he is still speaking with you, that obviously means that things aren’t so terrible between the two of you, as to make it an extraordinary effort to get back together. The more receptive he is, the better the odds.

Now, there are cases such as having children together, that requires him to talk to you…that level of communication doesn’t entirely count in this aspect. Also, sometimes he still wants to remain friendly but has no interest in fixing the relationship.

If he is texting or talking to you a lot, especially when there doesn’t seem to be a real necessity for him to do so, the better the odds that things can be salvaged.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

There are plenty of other signs that will be unique to your relationship and the variables that are set within it. Keep in mind that while generally, the number of positive signs you identify for reconciliation will improve the odds of getting back together, there is still no guarantee that he can be one back.

He is still an individual with his own desires, thoughts, and feelings…which means that he can take his life in whatever direction he chooses, with or without the former relationship intact.

Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

Does No Contact Rule Work to Get an Ex-Girlfriend Back?

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The No Contact Rule is a tried and true stand by for dealing with the post-breakup world one finds themselves in, once a relationship collapses. A common question that arises when this strategy is brought up is, does it actually work?

Can one get their ex-girlfriend to come back by avoiding any kind of verbal or social engagement with her? This has a high success rate? After all, what is so damn special about No Contact, and why should one not talk to the woman that he wants to get back together with?

Does No Contact Work with a High Success Rate?

When asking whether something works or not, I think that it’s important to define what that actually means. If you are asking for a fool-proof, 100% success rate way of getting an ex-girlfriend back fast…sorry, it doesn’t exist.

Each relationship is a separate problem unto itself. Each individual will have different desires and needs in their lives, thus, a blanket strategy isn’t going to have a 100% success rate to attract them back.

Is that really the issue, however? How few things in life, actually have a 100% success rate?

The actual question should be, does the No Contact Rule work better than the alternatives? In my experience, it does indeed.

Win ex back now

What do most guys do when they want to get their exes back? Is there any real coherent strategy? One day, you might not want her back, and then the next day she is all that you think about.

The emotional turmoil following a break up is so intense, that the plan to get her back is all over the place. Sometimes you’re strong and cool, sometimes you come off as desperate and needy.

What the No Contact Rule does on one level, is to keep up a consistent front for a period of time, so that one doesn’t blow his opportunity to reconcile the relationship.

That 3 AM text or phone call can come off mighty desperate, and only serves to hurt the chances, of ever getting things to work out.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

It’s kind of like basketball. You’re never going to hit 100% of the shots that you take, you’re going to miss eventually.

What the No Contact Rule does is to get you a higher percentage shot. Instead of some off balance, one-legged turnaround jumper while you have a broken wrist, and are 50 feet away from the basket…

Which is what you are essentially taking, while in that poor emotional state following the breakup. It work to help you emotionally, it gets her to have time apart to heal herself, and creates some intrigue. This is important, when she’s been hearing from you non-stop (this applies to some of you reading).

Does No Contact work? It can. Sometimes it doesn’t. However, it usually gives one the best odds of making the correct moves towards getting an ex back.  

Of course, there are cases where no matter what you do, she ain’t getting back together with you. You can try but at some point, it is time to move on with your life.

Why No Contact?

No Contact is essential because it gives both parties space and time to heal away from one another. In an emotional moment or highly charged emotional period of time, poor decisions can be made that someone who was sober and levelheaded wouldn’t make.

Let’s You Get a Clear Perspective without Her Influence

It of course would ‘feel’ good, to get back together with someone, immediately after they aren’t in your life any longer. Wanting to feel better in the short-term, isn’t a valid basis for a relationship.

There is a void and a depth of emotion that feels like it needs to be quelled after such an event. That doesn’t mean that it is the best long-term decision.

The breakup happened for a reason or multitude of reasons. These issues need to be worked out for a new relationship to work but sometimes these issues cannot be worked out.

Getting back together, when the differences cannot be mended, is a recipe for a failure over the long-term. It’s like putting tape over something that needs a serious repair, it might hold for a while, but it’ll break again eventually.

Gives Her Space

She needs space to figure out exactly what she wants in her life and as a man you need to do the same. With time and an appropriate perspective on things, you might find out that you want to take a completely different course with your life, and one that doesn’t involve your ex-girlfriend.

Do You Even Want Her Back?

However, without time apart from one another, you might never realize this fact and try to barrel forward with a reconciliation of a broken relationship. That distance and separation, never has time to take hold, and bring about clarity.

Time is an ally in this process because it allows the brain to heal. Make no mistake, love is like a drug, and a break up can feel like an addict losing their drug of choice.

How can one make a rational choice about how to move forward, if constant contact is maintained? The view of the right path to take will only emerge with the clarity imposed by time passed.

This is one reason so many people, keep going back to broken relationships, time and time again. They never take enough time off and/or don’t put in any work to figure out what’s actually best.

Gives You Time To Yourself

One of the most important aspect of the No Contact Period, is how much time is now available to focus on your own well-being.

Getting away from another person for a while, let’s you get your own life back in order, and fix what you’ve been neglecting.

Plus, you are more likely to find other opportunities, if you either don’t want to get back together or she doesn’t. This gives guys, a period of time to perhaps start seeing new women. (If he’s in the right emotional space and can handle it).

What is the No Contact Rule?

The No Contact Rule is basically cutting off communication with the ex-girlfriend for some period of time. This usually lasts for between 1-2 months.

During this period, the person doesn’t: talk to, text, email, interact with on Facebook, IG, Snapchat, or any other social media accounts. Not liking their posts or anything.

There are exceptions to the rule. For instance, you have to talk to them, because you have kids together or some other necessary arrangement.

In these scenarios, you are to be cordial, but essentially just handle your business with them. Don’t beg, plead, or talk about getting back together.

Most of the time, this process runs in the 30-45 day range. Sometimes, slightly shorter or longer, depending on individual circumstances. But, it always goes for more than a couple weeks.

What to Do During No Contact

Obviously, try to avoid talking to her as much as possible. However, I have always felt and made this a point to do in my own life, that this period of No Contact and indeed the post-breakup period itself should be about personal growth.

Take the time to focus on yourself and improving your life with or without her.

Read, workout, pursue interests, explore new opportunities…whatever. Don’t make rash decisions and upend your life on a whim BUT figure out ways that you can make yourself feel better that are positive, not self-destructive, and don’t rely on your ex-girlfriend as a positive stimulus.

This is a chance to really figure things out moving forward, about what you do and don’t want in your life. You improve yourself and heal during this time.

If she does want to get back together, she gets a better version of you. If not, well, you’re now in a great situation for yourself or to attract a new girl when you’re ready.

Here are some posts that cover this further:

What Comes After No Contact?

Hopefully, you took the opportunity to download the two free reports towards the top of the post, that help to lay out some of the dos and don’ts of texting your ex. Both of which were written by Michael Fiore as an introduction to his “Text Your Ex Back”.

He also recommends a period of no contact with an ex and also shows how to both work through the time apart and how to decide what to do next.

If you want further help working out things or really do want to make things work with an ex, this is something you’ll want to check out.

Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of shows including Rachel Ray’s to discuss his methods for romance.

“My ex was almost begging me to take him back” I love your program ! It’s so much worth it !! My ex came to me yesterday and was almost begging me to take him back !!! Just as you said it !! :D Thank you Michael !!!

“Hi Mike. Good program. The 30 days of no contact was crucial – helped work through myself, thoughts and feelings and work on my physical side – mind body and spirit. The “I like myself” exercise is extremely insightful as it reminds ourselves of who we are. My ex and I are giving at another go – small steps but all great journeys start with small steps. Talk was the game opener – being in our 50’s we did more talking face to face than texting but adapted some of the principles in this program. Thanks for helping me find myself first so I could have the opportunity to find my ex.”- Paul

If you are serious about wanting to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee:

300x250_txb_02

Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

How to Get Your Ex Back if She Just Wants to be Friends

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Ah, the dreaded friend zone. This is a spot which is usually reserved for guys who a girl has no romantic interest in initially and not a guy whom she has already dated.

However, there are circumstances in which after a break up, your ex-girlfriend might tell you that she just wants to be friends with you now, and that she doesn’t want the two of you to hate each other.

In principle, being friends with your ex doesn’t seem like such a bad proposition. But, it can turn out that way, based on the feelings you still have and what her true meaning is exactly.

In my experience, the whole just being friends thing, doesn’t really mean that the two of you are going to be best buds and hang out all of the time.

So, in this post, I want to explore a little bit of what it means for you and your ex to be ‘just friends’ and if there is a clear methodology to get yourself out of said situation or if it is even desirable.

I Want Us to Be Just Friends

Even ancient brahs got stuck in the friend zone

Even ancient brahs got stuck in the friend zone

Alright, so, you and this girl have had a sit down or she has texted and informed you of your new found friendship. You may have agreed that the two of you should remain friends in the aftermath of the breakup. Even though, you probably didn’t really mean it.

From your end, you still want her back as a girlfriend and are only being amenable to friendship, so that you can stay somewhat close to her.

Let’s just be honest from the start here, you are still sexually attracted to this girl. Plus, probably have romantic feelings towards her.

As such, there’s no purely Platonic relationship here and while you still care about her, you’re not really her ‘friend’!

On the flip side, she is suggesting being friends in order to: Either, let you down gently and diminish your intentions, of you trying to get back together with her. Or she is planning on keeping you around, for other purposes.

Being stuck in the friend zone means that, you will be giving away your time and attention, in exchange for something you don’t actually want (the illusion of true friendship).

In that situation, her emotional needs and need to have someone to download all of her problems onto is met by you, her now ‘neutered’ ex-boyfriend. Meanwhile, she can go out and get her physical needs satisfied by other men…whom she still has sexual attraction to.

Listen to this clip below, for a great explanation of the ‘Time Ho’ phenomenon, and see if it doesn’t describe your current situation.

Listen, man, the break down of this problem is actually quite simple.

If you really just want to be friends, have other girls around, and no longer have any type of real attraction to this girl…then by all means, go be a friendly guy.

That’s cool, just don’t get what the relationship is now, confused with what it used to be.

If you actually just want to get back with her or you are undecided if that’s the best course of action to take, then, don’t try to fool yourself into thinking that the two of you are pals.

It’s an either or thing. You can be friends with an ex if that same spark is no longer there. Or, you can still desire her, and want to reconcile the relationship. Trying to play it both ways, isn’t tenable, in the long-term.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

Escape from Friend Zone Mountain

Removing yourself from the friend zone is a laborious process. The first thing that I would consider, is if being with this girl is truly what I want or am I just carrying leftover emotional baggage.

If it is the latter, then, I would suggest getting to work with moving on with your life and letting go of this failed relationship…there are literally billions of others out there for us to pursue.

Getting past it, is mostly a function of time mixed with the pursuit of personal growth, so that your life doesn’t stagnate and you don’t become consumed with the past and what was.

If you are hellbent on getting out of the friend zone and trying to get back together with this girl, however, just know that while it can be done, it is never a guarantee to work.

Ask yourself if you really want to spend time chasing something that may never be and even if it comes to fruition, it won’t be the same as it once was.

Luckily, this decision doesn’t have to be made on the spot, as the best path to follow whether moving on from or trying to get out of the friend zone with your ex-girlfriend is the same…at least initially.

Is it possible to get out of the friend zone with an ex? Yes, I’ve done it before but the funny thing is, I no longer wanted those girls around by the time they became interested in me once again.

It works out that way sometimes, where you’ve grown as a person to the point that a girl you once were really into, no longer holds the same meaning in your life.

That’s why taking time apart can be so damn important. Emotional distress and everything that comes with it, can push you towards one outcome.

Acting on emotions, you could end up in a situation, you may not actually want for yourself in the long-term. It’s sort of a temporary state, where you can’t really make good decisions.

No Contact? Hell yeah, No Contact!

In order to extricate yourself from the friend zone, you must not allow yourself to get sucked deeper into it.

That’s an impossible task if you are constantly answering her phone calls and listening to her complain about her day. You cannot allow yourself to get dragged further down into the abyss and becoming an utterly neutral man in her eyes (i.e. she doesn’t feel that sexual attraction) because that will only increase the severity of the problem.

I’ve already discussed the No Contact Rule in length, here. As such, I’m not going to delve into it in this article. However, I will say that you will need to go roughly a month of no contact, so that you can even begin to start crawling out of the friend zone.

But…but…won’t she forget about me? Only if you’re forgettable. Besides, you cannot think like that, you have to be willing to lose a girl completely.

Even if that fact hurts to think about, as men, we have to cultivate the ability to walk away from situations because our disinterest can sometimes be the only way of preserving our respect.

When that high level physical and emotional interest (on her end) no longer exists like it did at the start of the relationship, one has to choose the most attractive path available.

For most guys, this means either some level of indifference, or being the lapdog who begs for her back. The first one is way more attractive, than the chick repellent that is desperate behavior.

make dem changes

What to do During No Contact?

What I would suggest doing during this No Contact period is taking a hyper-interest in yourself and your life.

Yes, self-development is the main thing that I would focus on. I cannot spend my time solely thinking about her, and how much I can’t wait for this period of time to end, so that I can send her a text message again.

This type of obsession seems to be common, especially among men, as we usually have a tougher time dealing with breakups and the emotions that follow.

We also, will usually develop strong feelings for women, if they happen to be the only option that is around. In this case, our ex-girlfriend was our main squeeze and when we lose her henceforth, it becomes almost a compulsion to get her back.

While I think it is a terrible idea to jump into a serious relationship right after you just got out of one. I think that it is a great idea to starting dating casually again, in order to gain clarity. (If you suck at getting girls, I’ve written two Kindle books on this subject: Game without Games and Online Dating for Men ) Going out with other girls does multiple things…

First, it allows you to viscerally understand that your ex is not the only girl out there who may be a decent match for you. Thus, her hold on you is lessened. It also might make it clear for you, that you don’t actually need to pursue your ex-girlfriend, anymore.

Secondly, it diffuses your interest among many girls instead of concentrating it on the one you don’t have.

Think about it, if you have 20 girls who you can text with and probably get to meet you out somewhere, are you really going to be as attached to the one who currently has you stuck in the friend zone? Probably not.

Thirdly, your value on the sexual market is raised. If many women want you or hang around you for dates, you are a much more desirable man in the eyes of every other woman (including your ex).

People’s perception becomes their reality. For example, if two identical men are at a crowded bar and one of them is standing alone while the other is surrounded by people, which one has more value?

The man with lots of friends and women, even though he is identical to the man that is standing alone. It is mere perception of value that changes the level of attractiveness.

What that means for your ex-girlfriend, is that if she’s noticing that your are getting along fine without her, the idea that she made a mistake might start creeping into her head. After all, these other women seem to be enjoying my ex, maybe I had something really good and let it get away.

Whether she starts thinking that or not, the idea is to sort of reset the conception she has of you in her mind. Start dating other girls during this no contact period and keep it going after contact has been established.

Other things that you can do in order to start raising your value is to change your physical appearance for the better, learn new skills, start new projects, find new social activities to engage in…really anything that alters the perception of who you are (and that you enjoy doing) will begin to dissolve her old perception of you and help to recast you in a new light.

Go hard. Really plan it out, as to how you’re going to improve your life, whether she’s around or not. It’s a winning move, because your life gets better, and a man with an awesome life is really attractive to women; even those who’ve dated you before.

What to Do Post-No Contact

Well, reestablish contact with her.

Remember though, that you cannot act like the same old guy by begging to have her come back to you and all the desperate attention seeking things of that nature.

Still have other girls lined up for dates. So, for instance, if you end up setting up a meeting with you ex on Wednesday, try having dates on Tuesday and Thursday (or other times during the week) so that your ex is just another girl in the rotation and not elevated above.

In my experience with getting out of the friend zone, I found that treating the failed relationship as completely done was the best course to follow.

Whatever emerged with my ex after the breakup was an entirely new edifice that we were constructing. This meant, I couldn’t give her the same type of priority treatment she had, when we were together.

I got back to her when I felt like it, I accepted offers to hang out at my convenience, I never broke my other plans just to go listen to her nonsense.

In essence, I reclaimed my sovereignty as a man, and the girl had to work her way back to the top of the depth chart if she wanted more of my time. Even then, the result was to keep it casual, and we never ‘got back together’ beyond hanging out and hooking up.

Relationships should only be carried out on your terms. If she continues to stick you in the friend zone when you have no interest in that, then you can completely sever ties with her.

Like I said, getting out of the friend zone doesn’t always work and there are going to be instances in which you cannot rekindle a romance. The good news is that, by the time you’ve figured out whether she might want you back, you may have already moved on to bigger and better things.

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Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back

Make My Ex Boyfriend Regret Losing Me

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There are of course a myriad of emotional standpoints one can find themselves starting from after someone breaks up with you. Some, go for the ‘I have to get my ex back at all costs‘ strategy. While others, seem to like to go with the ‘I’m going to make my ex-boyfriend regret letting me go’.

In either case, the best route to take may not be the one that immediately pops into your head while the emotions of the relationship are still fresh. With a clear head, one can recognize these types of ‘revenge’ actions as purely petty and egotistical.

After all, what do you really end up ‘winning’ when trying to get back at someone for having the audacity to leave you? The real answer when you set all of the BS aside, is nothing of importance.

In this post, I want to explore what I mean and how to move past this notion of wanting to make this guy regret losing you from his life.

Win ex back now

Why Do You Want Him to Feel Regret?

Ok, so you’ve allowed yourself to get to the point of researching of how to plot emotional revenge on someone, which means you’ve probably been thinking about this for at least some time.

Ask yourself, what is at the core of these types of feelings?

Because let’s be very clear about something, you are dealing in the world of feelings, and not of rational thought. Feelings can be a good guidepost for exploring what we want and what we don’t want in our lives.

However, feelings can also lead us astray and down paths which are ultimately pointless or self-destructive.

Feelings are just feelings. Feelings are not you. The fundamental mistake is identifying yourself based on feelings.

You are not anger, nor sadness, nor envy, nor any other temporary state of emotion.  Precisely because thoughts and feelings are temporary and always changing, they can never be who we truly are.

Are you the anger you felt once when you were six years old? Of course not. They can certainly hijack our lives but we don’t have to give them the power or follow them to whatever random place our thoughts and feelings wish to take us.

Instead, we can observe them, get to the source of where the are coming from, and then let them go. Releasing this attachment, which only serves as a weight which will drag us down.

Releasing the Negative

Let’s take a close look at this current emotional situation. Your current state is obviously aligned towards the negative. This has to be the case, if you are seeking revenge on someone, for no longer wishing to be in a voluntary relationship with you.

After all, where was the guarantee that this relationship was going to work out forever for the both of you?

So, you currently reside on a lower tier of emotion (negative) and you wish to use someone else’s pain, discomfort, and/or longing which you will manufacture, in order to catapult yourself to a higher tier (positive or at least the illusion of feeling better).

Instead of focusing on moving forward alone or attempting to reconcile things with him, you are planning on devoting your energy, to satisfying the narrative about your past relationship you have got going on in your mind?

Stop listening to the constant mental loop of thoughts and feelings that are telling you to get back at him and make him feel shitty about the break up.

This story you have running through your mind is poisonous to an enjoyable life. It is only strengthening your dependence, on people or things which are external to you, and which you cannot control.

If you do get the reaction that you desire, the ‘positive’ feelings will only be temporary. Plus, if you don’t succeed in making him react, in the manner you want, you will be dragged deeper into negativity.

For a moment, I would like for you to consider not focusing on how to make him feel bad about letting you go. Rather, try to gain mental clarity and focus on letting your attachment to this idea of  creating regret go.

People come and go out of our lives. Sometimes, it’s a simple change and other times it can be an ugly breakup when egos are seriously invested. Chasing after petty points and victories post-breakup are ultimately very hollow ‘wins’.

You’ve really only succeeded in possibly hurting someone you probably still care about on some level. You have given a boost to your own ego, instead of turning your attention inward, and making your own life better and more vibrant.

If he really is a terrible person and he is now no longer a part of your life, why would you want to change that? Leave things as they are and move forward.

His negativity, meanness, or bad actions don’t need to be matched by you. The relationship is over. Take any important lessons from it and follow your life’s path.

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Turn Your Focus on Betterment and Watch Others Perk Up Around You

The funny thing is that, people will tend to notice the positive changes you make within your life, and how you’ve changed as a person.

So, if you’re focusing on self improvement rather than simply trying to make your ex feel regret, he might naturally come to regret breaking up with you…simply because you’ve become such a great person with an awesome life.

I’ve seen this sort of thing in action first hand, with women, in my case. Back when I couldn’t get girlfriends, dates, sex, etc. I would think that I was simply not attractive to women and I’d never be able to interest them very much.

I was partly correct, I wasn’t attractive to women at that time. However, I could develop myself into the man I wanted to be and thereby attract women into the world I had created for myself.

This included reading books constantly, getting into better shape physically, learning to socialize, developing my personal philosophy, pursuing my passions, working on my ideal lifestyle, etc.

All of these things in totality, over the years has yielded a much greater ability to attract women and make them want to be a part of my life…just by being who I was and not having to ‘chase’ them.

Even women who turned me down, when I was without confidence or skill, took notice of the change and some even made themselves available to me.

The journey of life is ultimately about yourself and coming to terms with your existence in a world that can be flat out crazy and emotionally draining. It can however, also be beautiful, and gearing yourself up to pursue the beautiful in life has plenty of benefits.

One of which being, that people are naturally attracted to confidence and others who make their lives their own.

So, in a very real way, the key to make someone regret leaving you behind, is to not focus on making them feel regret. The key is to focus on yourself and creating your ideal life.

Let other people have their pettiness and emotional manipulations. You should rise above that, understand what they’re doing, and love them anyways. The revenge notion or getting the better of someone post-breakup is quite frankly a waste of time.

Don’t let yourself become controlled by these intense emotions but let yourself observe them arise and notice how they effect your thinking in a negative manner. Once you’ve done this, the grip these negative feelings have over you begin to weaken and you see them for how silly they truly are.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

Why Won’t My Ex-Girlfriend Reply to My Text Messages?

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The modern communication abilities that we have thanks to technology have been absolutely great for guys in their dating lives. Texting and apps like Tinder have enabled us to avoid calling the old fashioned house phone and talk to as many available girls as we want.

However, it has also empowered those women, including our ex-girlfriends to ignore our text, Facebook, or other direct messages whenever it suits them.

Why would an ex ignore your texts and ultimately just not respond to them? Well, why one may be ignoring you specifically is a tough nut to crack without having the exact details and circumstances involved (and no I’m not Dr.Phil trying to solve all your woes).

BUT what I can do, is present some common reasons that your old girlfriend just isn’t going to talk to you.

My Ex Won’t Text Me Back…Some Possible Reasons Why

She’s Moved On

One thing you should know about women. When they’re done, they’re done (most of the time). Yes, you can have situations for a while where she isn’t exactly sure how to feel about you, she might still talk with you, or even sleep together.

At some point, though, that final frontier is crossed and she is ready to move on with her life. Now, this can mean that she wants to be alone without a partner for a while or that she is seeing other guys.

I know that it can hurt to thing about someone you were close with being with another, but it is a simple fact of life that we all must contend with from time to time.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

We do have to let go of people eventually and if there’s a good chance that she’s moved on, you should prepare to do the same. This means going about your life, making positive changes, working towards goals, and even dating other girls.

Now, things may change in the future and a reconciliation may eventually be possible but while we can hope for the best we must plan for the most likely outcome.

Moving on isn’t always a finality. I have had ex-girlfriends break up with me and want nothing to do with me, only to later feel the need to contact me again.

It’s a really weird phenomenon sometimes, like, you just need to let people go out and explore the world on their own…and the ideas they have in their heads, don’t work out as they thought. Then, they just start reaching out for anything familiar to them.

I had one girl that I dated, hit me up in successive years under the guise of both being ‘just friends’ and then also, trying to have a sexual relationship. I hadn’t spoken to her in years and had zero feelings toward her any longer. Crazy, but it happens a lot to people.

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You’ve Become a Creep

When some people get desperate to get their ex back, they start texting the girl way too much, becoming almost stalker like, or even becoming violent/angry towards them. The violent aspect doesn’t apply to most guys, but many guys do text their ex-girlfriends a lot and come off as needy and weak.

If this applies to you, back off. Going no contact, might not get an ex-girlfriend to come back. However, it isn’t going to make things worse. The situation needs to cool off and both parties need their space to live their lives.

Being the creepy or stalker-ish ex-boyfriend is a huge turnoff to women and it isn’t going to make her respond to whatever texts may come her way.

I’ve never successfully gotten a girl to come back, trying to go the texting and explaining route. However, I have gotten girlfriends to become interested in me again, after I went No Contact and stopped making myself appear desperate to have her back in my life.

Obsessiveness and desperation are major turn offs for people. Yes, she knows you well after dating for so long. But, that relationship is now severed and it becomes quite easy to push her further away while desperately trying to grasp her attention back to you.

Guys really need to chill with this shit.

She’s Up on a Pedestal…and You Put Her There

This is a offshoot of the last point. Texting a girl a lot and becoming really emotional about her is quite repulsive to women. Don’t treat her as if she is some sort of perfect angel and that your life is over without her (it isn’t).

Why would she respond favorably towards a guy she knows she has some control over and can get him back any time she pleases? Where’s the challenge? Where’s the equality in the relationship?

Essentially, you make yourself less attractive as a man because you’ve ceded your masculinity and everything that she probably used to find attractive.

Don’t beg. Don’t be a lapdog. Use this time period as an opportunity to improve your life, regardless if she ever comes back or not. Chicks come and go BUT the one constant in your life is YOU.

Which guy would she be more likely to go back to?

The guy who texts and pretty much obsesses over her or the guy who is out doing positive things with his life and seeing other women? The answer is the latter.

The post-breakup period is a trying time emotionally, I get it, I’ve been there.

The problem is, when we’re hyped up in these insanely emotional states, we do dumb things that we believe will ‘solve our problems’ but really just destroy our chances of resolving anything.

One of the dumb things we do, is to go into begging and pleading mode. Or better yet, the complete idealization of her and the relationship, but if everything was so perfect…it wouldn’t have failed.

A man has to maintain his cool throughout this process, whether the outcome is what you want, or one that doesn’t work out in your favor. Again, time and the right plan, can often flip situations for the better. You just can’t mess things up in the meantime.

She’s Just Pissed Off at You

Sometimes, it isn’t a big thing where she’s moved on or she’s lost interest in you. It might just be a temporary situation, where she’s completely pissed off at you and needs more time to cool off before she’s ready to talk to you.

This one isn’t such a big deal usually, unless you did something really terrible like cheat on her…then yeah, you might be fucked. There can be lots of little reasons she might not want to respond to anything you say at the moment. This is just a storm you’ve got to ride out.

Emotional states change and the thought patterns that make someone be really mad, eventually pass, and they can think rationally once again. Time apart allows cooler heads to prevail and give someone clarity about what they want and don’t want in their lives.

That clarity might make a woman realize, that the relationship she just ended is the best option for her in life, and that the anger she felt wasn’t really anything major.

Just like you might currently be in a volatile emotional state, she probably is as well. There’s a huge flux in people’s moods following a breakup, so, what she might be mad about now perhaps won’t bother her next month.

Personally, I’d rather have a woman be mad at me, than not caring at all. At least, I know she feels something, and still has an attachment. Even if, it is currently a negative view toward me.

What Can You Do When She Won’t Reply to Your Messages?

Really, the best moves you can make are to:

1. Not send any more messages, see the no contact rule post

2. Prepare to move on, even if she comes back.

3. Try to re-contact again, at a later date.

The first aspect gives her space and allows you to stop coming off as really desperate and unattractive. While the second, makes it easier to move past the breakup if it is indeed a permanent thing and it very well might be.

Then, when things have settled down a bit, maybe a month or so from now. You can try to open up the lines of communication again. This is only if, you’ve really put thought into things and still want to try to get back together with her.

A lot of times, once you’ve had time apart and gotten your head clear, you find out that you don’t actually want to be with the ex. You figure out that most of what you were feeling was an almost addictive quality, because you were so used to being together, that a break up shocked your system.

Of course, your own situation will vary but as far as a general point of view that about does it. There are some many variables and reasons why she may not be responding but the only one who knows for sure is her.

What’s the first move?

Obviously, in order to attempt to re-start a relationship, contact has to be reestablished with your ex at some point. She’s not currently responding to your texts, but at some point, she very well could.  Of course, we still have to give things time, and let the situation settle down but texting can be an amazing weapon to give things another try.

Think about it:

  • They don’t have to agree to meet you face to face right away.
  • That message can sit on their phone until they are ready to respond. More time equals a greater chance.
  • You can craft the right message to them.
  • It’s a private and personal way of communication.

Hopefully, you took the opportunity to download the two free reports towards the top of the post, that help to lay out some of the dos and don’ts of texting your ex. Both of which were written by Michael Fiore as an introduction to his “Text Your Ex Back” program.

Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of television shows, to discuss his methods at repairing broken relationships.

If you are serious about wanting to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee:

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breakup

Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

How to Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back if She Broke Up with You

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There are a ton of variations of how and why relationships end. One of the most common ones, is a man’s girlfriend dumps him and doesn’t give a reason or maybe just not a very believable one. Having your woman leave you is a tough L to take, it’s just one of those losses that stings for a while no matter what you try to do to remedy the hurt.

However, even in the midst of that emotional pain, there is still that raw and gnawing feeling that you want her back in your life. The question is, can you get an ex-girlfriend back, if she is the one who initiated the end of the relationship?

Yes. Yes, you can. The thing is, there are also important questions such as, if that is even a good idea or if it is likely to succeed?

In this post, I want to dig a little bit further into this topic and try to illuminate somethings one should consider when trying to reconnect with an ex after getting dumped.

Things can get complicated emotionally, so, it is important to take time to really consider how everything has played out and what you want your future to look like.

It gets lonely sometimes

It gets lonely sometimes

Achieving Total Clarity

So, the first and probably most important step in trying to get back an ex-girlfriend is to decide that you actually want to. No, I’m not talking about some hokey, “Law of Attraction” type of stuff.

What I mean, is to get out from under the cloud of emotion and bruised ego, and truly know that trying to restart things with her is the best decision for your life.

Let’s be honest, most of the hurt that comes along with many breakups is manufactured by the repetitive conditioning of your interactions with one another.

You’ve grown accustomed to this girl being there and when she isn’t, you are no longer receiving the positive emotional feedback, and as such it feels like something is missing.

This type of feeling will arise, whether you truly love the girl or just really liked her a lot, which is confusing because it can feel exactly the same in the short-term.

However, in the long-term clarity will arise. The feedback cycle is broken, and you can realize, that perhaps you didn’t feel as strongly towards her as you might have thought.

I think that all guys go through this type of thing. We trip out over girls and then later come to realize what an awful mistake staying with them would have been.

There are plenty of girls who I dated in my college-age years, who I was absolutely devastated by when they broke up with me.

BUT when I fast-forwarded a few months, I knew that I had dodged a bullet with some of them (being with for longer, getting married, accidentally knocking them up). It’s kind of crazy how much the mind can shift, with a bit of time, and normalcy.

If you’re a younger guy, please understand that this is going to have more of an effect on you, precisely because you have less experience. Relationships are still rather new in your life and there is a huge difference between high school/college and the more serious stuff that comes with age.

It’s like the difference between amateur and professional sports, there’s just a different level of seriousness and competition.

Clarity is an extremely hard thing to achieve when that other person is still involved in your life on some level. I usually want to go no contact for 30-60 days, so that I can take a step back a analyze the situation without being constantly triggered emotionally.

Don’t worry the ex-girlfriend isn’t going to forget about you in that short of time, unless you were a totally forgettable man.

Sometimes, an ex will move on within a short time frame. Though, even that doesn’t always preclude them from reaching out to contact, or even pursue some sort of reconciliation.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

What Are Some Things to Consider?

What ended the relationship? Think beyond just what she told you and dig to the roots of the problems. Did you cheat? If so, that adds a whole lot more complexity to this situation.

Also, if you did cheat, why did you do it? Were you bored, no longer attracted, want other chicks besides her (like not just fantasy but actively flirting and trying to pick them up)?

Yes, these all have an impact as to whether you should even want to try to get back together again. You might be chasing something that you feel emotionally guilty about, however, at your very core you may know that the relationship was on the way out anyways.

Did she cheat? My policy on this is to move on. Fuck dealing with unfaithful people, if she wants to screw around that is her prerogative. But it is also mine to say that, it violates the confines of our relationship, and she needs to move on.

How much time has elapsed? If it has been close to a year or more and nothing has changed, you either need a new approach or to get on with your love life. If she’s already been seeing other guys for a while and has moved into a more serious relationship with one of them, that’s another solid sign that it may be time to accept that it’s over.

What type of relationship was it? How serious did it get? A girl who is in high school or college, is most likely not ready to settle down for a very long term relationship (marriage), and will likely want to experience many new relationships or types of guys after she gets out of something semi-serious (long-term boyfriend).

However, if things did get very serious and she is either older or more mature, then there is a better chance that you could still be the right man for the job.

The breakup could have been caused by simple bad habits or a lack of direction/maturity on your part and she might be in the stage of life where she demands a man that meets all of her needs/qualifications.

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What Are Some of Your Flaws and How Do You Improve Them?

I am a huge believer in self-improvement. Not just in terms of getting attention from women but also in every other aspect of my life. In my own personal experience, I can tell you that perception of reality is not always the same as reality itself, and it is also more powerful.

What I mean is, how you are perceived will have a greater impact than who you actually are in many given situations. For instance, the same guy walks into a bar, in one instance he is alone and in another he is with a group of women.

In which instance is he more attractive to any given female in the bar? When he is with the group of women, even though he is fundamentally the same person. The only change is in the perception of him and his value as a man.

Let’s be real, your girlfriend isn’t going to leave you if she still perceives you as a high value man.

Yes, you may be everything she wants EXCEPT you have anger issues that pushes her away (in that case , you lack of emotional control has collapsed your value as a man).

Or maybe you haven’t shown signs that you are serious about long-term commitment. Or you aren’t very much fun to be around more. You’re too controlling. Etc, etc.

If you and the relationship that you had with your ex had too many flaws, then of course she is going to start looking around at other guys and thinking that she can do better.

It isn’t always the case that she will want you back even if you do make yourself a better man because sometimes it’s just simply a lack of compatibility on a deep level. However, if there was true long-term compatibility, there may be certain things that drove her away…fixable things!

For instance, maybe you weren’t spending enough time together. Perhaps, you were too engaged in work, hanging out with your boys, playing video games, watching sports, or whatever…if this was a main cause of the break up, then this should be a main area of trying to improve yourself.

Step away from your diversions, minimize them, try to work on patterns of addictive behaviors. Make a list of areas of your life you need to improve in…from health, to wealth, to sexual skill, to confidence, communication, or any other potential factor.

Seriously, if you work on yourself and then don’t get this girl back, at least you’ve improved your odds at landing more ladies and finding one that is also a right fit for you. Keep in mind that there are ultimately billions of them on this planet, so if you can make yourself available and more desirable you can, land plenty more.

Conversely, she could have also been the source of many of the relationship’s problems. There are cases in which one person creates lots of issues and then initiates a break up anyway.

If this is the case for your, break up, ask yourself if it is actually worth it? Is getting back together with this woman, something that is good for the long haul, or simply a way to patch up the short-term emotional turmoil?

get better or this guy might take your girl

get better or this guy might take your girl

Taking the Time to Change

In order to show significant change and actually make changes to one’s life, there does need to be some time apart. A lot of guys will still currently be in ‘chase mode’, when trying to get back with his ex.

What this means is, he is still calling or texting or desperately begging to get back together…and it’s simply not working.

You cannot press a woman to want to get back together with you. She will begin to resent it and find a guy unattractive, when he displays such groveling characteristics.

Also, constantly being in contact or trying to fix things, doesn’t allow her the ability to think about what she actually wants. There are plenty of cases in which, the girl breaks up with her guy, and realizes that the single life can suck.

She realizes that she’s not meeting any ‘better men’ and her ex starts to look really great in comparison. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and when things don’t work out, she might turn her attention back to you.

However, how can that happen, when he ex is constantly bothering her and displaying unattractive characteristics? Even if she finds out that being single isn’t great, it would still be more appealing than an ex, calling her constantly.

As such, utilizing the No Contact Rule, is a way to create enough space and work to better yourself for a potential reconciliation.

Taking a month or two apart, isn’t a bad thing. It allows both parties to fully consider what they want to do, experience life without the other person, and to improve themselves.

Getting clarity doesn’t just happen when you see the negatives of the relationship, it can also show you all of the positives, and why it should be fixed. When emotions calm down and reality sets in, people will tend to recognize that they actually had something great, and worth the work that it takes to make a relationship successful.

What’s the first move?

So, once a period of time apart has been taken, contact will need to be re-established if you still want to try and get back an ex.

However, by that time, you might have gained the clarity that you’d be better off moving on. That’s cool and can be the best decision for folks, in many cases. Not all relationships are worth trying to save, as they simply aren’t functional, at their core.

However, when one determines that it is worth at least attempting to salvage, there needs to be a strategy in place for making the effort. After a month or two of not talking and still being apart, getting back into contact, is of paramount concern.

One of the easiest and also most effective methods for doing so, is by use of text messaging. I mean, it is not only easy to do, but you can also take all of the time you need to craft a message and future response.

Plus, it takes the pressure off of the other person, who can respond whenever or if they feel like it. A call or face to face meeting can be brushed off, as too intrusive, but a text is both casual and weirdly intimate because folks have their phones nearly all of the time. It’s like a part of themselves.

Here is relationship expert Michael Fiore. explaining texts as a form of communication for relationships:

Hopefully, you took the opportunity to download the two free reports towards the top of the post, that help to lay out some of the dos and don’ts of texting your ex. Both of which were written by Mr. Fiore as an introduction to his “Text Your Ex Back”.

Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of shows including Rachel Ray’s to discuss his methods for romance.

If you are serious about wanting to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee:

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I Want My Ex Back…but He Doesn’t Want Me

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A break up has taken place, one party was either dumped or did the dumping, and now the former relationship is in complete disrepair. That’s fine, assuming both parties want to move on and go their own ways. But what happens when you want your ex-boyfriend back and he doesn’t feel the same way? How does one approach this situation? Can you make him want to come back into the fold?

Is That What You Want?

The absolute foundation of any pursuit of an ex has to begin with the questions of: Is this really what you want? Is it actually worth pursuing?

The loneliness and the harsh realities of life after a breakup, can often have people’s emotions reeling, and having them want to do anything in order to get back together with their ex and ‘fix’ what ails them.

It’s not always an easy process to get back together with an ex-boyfriend, and it can definitely take some time to pull off. As such, one has to be sure that this is truly what they want in their lives, and not just act out of the pure raw emotion that stems from a break up.

There can be an addictive aspect to relationships. One expects their former partner to be around because they have been for a long time and once they no longer around, it feels really bad. It’s an emptiness, a longing.

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The thing of it is, this feeling can still be found within you, even if you weren’t 100% compatible with someone. I’ve gotten dumped by girls before, been completely torn up about it for months, only to later on realize how truly lucky I was to get out of that relationship.

None of those ladies would’ve been the right fit for me on a long-term basis. BUT it still hurt really bad when it happened.

That’s one of the reasons that the No Contact Rule after a break up is so effective and important, it provides clarity.

With enough time apart, the emotions can subside, to the point where you can make a rational choice about what exactly it is you want in your life. Sometimes, you find out that he isn’t it and other times you can figure out that reconciliation is something that is worth attempting.
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Why Doesn’t He Want To Get Back Together?

Another factor to consider is why in particular doesn’t he want to be in a relationship. Was it something specific that took place that ended the relationship? Or is he just burned out or no longer ‘into’ you?

It can be a good idea to roughly consider what the odds are that the break up can be mended. Look for some of the more common signs that a relationship can be fixed or that a guy would consider coming back. If none are apparently present, than the odds of getting back together are substantially lower (not always impossible but lower).

What are some other indicators that lower the likelihood of fixing the broken relationship?

  • Cheating- especially if you were the one straying
  • Is he dating other girls? Is there one in particular?
  • There are other huge compatibility problems that stem from the relationship
  • He has shown no real interest in doing anything aside from moving on with his life.

There is no ‘one size fits all’ remedy for determining if a relationship is 100% salvageable. Sometimes, the odds seem long and the ex comes back.

Other times, it looks like a good shot, but they’re just ready to move forward alone. Take a look at your own situation and determine whether or not it’s likely and if you actually want to pursue attempting to heal the broken relationship.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

Is it Even True?

Now, you should take someone at face value, if they verbally state that they ‘Don’t want you back’.

However, we also know from our lives, that people don’t always mean or stick to what they say.

Things can feel like they’re true, in the moment. But when emotions calm down, time elapses, and there is more reflection taking place…they see that they didn’t actually mean it.

If everyone actually stuck to what they meant about not wanting their partner back, there’d be a whole bunch fewer relationships, out there today.

There’s the heat of the moment. There’s reconsideration. People will say lots of things, that may or may not turn out to be accurate, in the longer run.

So, even if a guy says he doesn’t want his ex-girlfriend back, he could very well change his mind later on. Again, I’m not saying that this is the case, but it is well within the realm of possibility.

To Be Chased, One Has to Stop Chasing

One common mistake after a breakup that sooooo many people do, is being constantly trying to contact, be available, and begging their ex.

Guess what? If that worked, then literally everyone would be back with their exes. Yet, here we are with people still continually falling into the same trap.

The first step to turning things around is to go No Contact for a period of time, as mentioned above. This usually lasts for about 30 days. The purpose of following the No Contact rule is to allow the emotions to subside BUT also to get yourself to stop trying to hit an ex up all of the time.

It’s hard to make someone think that you’re desirable again, when they know that they can have you back at the drop of the dime. A certain level of scarcity makes things appear more valuable to the human mind and familiarity can have to opposite effect.

Won’t someone forget about you if you don’t remind them that you exist?

NO! I’ve gone no contact with exes and had them contact me weeks or months later…and these were girls who dumped me!

Why? Many times, life after a breakup doesn’t go so well, and down the line the realization that they may have lost something important in their lives, sets in. They can often think that the grass is greener but learn quickly this single life, ain’t always what you think it might be.

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What’s he Coming Back To?

If a breakup took place, that means that the old relationship had problems. It can also mean in this scenario, that he’s no longer feeling you like he once was.

So, even if begging him today actually worked, what has changed? Meaning, how long until the reconciled relationship fell apart again? What’s different both in terms of the relationship itself and you as a person?

How are the problems going to be addressed?

What are some things that you need to work on?

Self-improvement can be a huge step in this process. Not only in case he does eventually want to come back but also for your life, if you decided that it’s time to move on.

This doesn’t mean that you have to change everything about yourself in order to appeal to him.

However, becoming an overall more well-rounded, stable, and attractive person can do wonders for how you are perceived by him (and other potential suitors).

I remember when I first got into really good shape and how more women took notice of me.  When that happened, other girls that weren’t interested also took notice (as well as an ex). I didn’t want that particular ex back, so, it went nowhere…but the spark was reignited.

Now, this of course was all a very superficial change, but it got attention. Sometimes, that’s all it takes, but I always like to improve every aspect in my life post-breakup.

What type of relationship does he even want? What are some of the changes that you could make about yourself or the way you interact with him, that’d be useful for the relationship?

Do you even want to make those changes? If not, it may be a good idea to move on.

Get down to the root issues of the relationship. What were the negative things that you contributed towards its demise? Are those things that can be changed? Even if you make the positive changes, would he fix his issues, as well?

What’s the first move?

When trying to get back with an ex, the line of communication, must be opened up at some point. Trying to call or meet in person, can be met with rejection, or annoyance on the ex-boyfriend’s part. However, texting does offer an alternative possibility.

Think about it:

  • They don’t have to agree to meet you face to face right away.
  • That message can sit on their phone until they are ready to respond. More time equals a greater chance.
  • You can craft the right message to them.
  • It’s a private and personal way of communication.

Here is relationship expert Michael Fiore. explaining texts as a form of communication for relationships:

Hopefully, you took the opportunity to download the two free reports towards the top of the post, that help to lay out some of the dos and don’ts of texting your ex. Both of which were written by Mr. Fiore as an introduction to his “Text Your Ex Back”.

Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of shows including Rachel Ray’s to discuss his methods for romance.

Here is what some of Text Your Ex Back’s users had to say about their success with the program:

“Not only did this program change my relationship with what i feel is the most incredible and unique girl i have met so far in my life, but you actually helped me change my life for the better. Ever thought this could be a life changing event for someone? Not to mention how inexpensive and how user friendly the program is, no amount of money or words could express how truly grateful i am for what you have done for me as a man. And for that i would just like to say…Thank You!”- Matthew R.

“Hi Mike. Good program. The 30 days of no contact was crucial – helped work through myself, thoughts and feelings and work on my physical side – mind body and spirit. The “I like myself” exercise is extremely insightful as it reminds ourselves of who we are. My ex and I are giving at another go – small steps but all great journeys start with small steps. Talk was the game opener – being in our 50’s we did more talking face to face than texting but adapted some of the principles in this program. Thanks for helping me find myself first so I could have the opportunity to find my ex.”- Paul

If you are serious about wanting to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee:

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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breakup

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My Ex-Boyfriend Told Me to Move On

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All righty, there are certain times after a break up happens that an ex-boyfriend will tell you point blank, “You should move on from me”. For whatever reason, he is either tired of dealing with the relationship as a whole or is seeing another woman or some other factor.

Nonetheless, as the woman, you may still have feelings for him and want him back even after being told to get going with your own life without him. This of course, hurts like hell, but what is a girl supposed to do in this situation?

Well, for my money, the best course of action is to prepare for the most likely outcome but to not necessarily give up on the outcome that you’d like the most.

However, this has to come with the understanding that getting back together (no matter how much you want it to happen) is not always the best outcome in specific circumstances.

Get Specific About Your Broken Relationship

When he told you to move on, did he really mean it? I mean, really who knows what he was specifically thinking as an individual, but as a baseline rule…take his words as the truth.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that he cannot change his mind (or that you can’t change yours about reconciling the relationship), but that as of now the relationship has officially ended and any new one that will form out of its ashes, isn’t likely to occur.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

The odds of getting back together are of course wholly dependent on the variables of your own unique situation.

Naturally, there are some universal factors that lowers the odds of fixing things for everyone, like if you cheated on him or he is seeing other women or he is moving away or whatever else.

If multiple issues are involved as a part of the breakup then their effect is compounded and the odds of getting back together are much lower.

If he told you to move on, then the most likely scenario, is that he dumped you. Of course, some reading this may be in the opposite situation but I’ll assume the former is what happened.

If the break up was unexpected on your end and you don’t exactly know the reasons why he broke up with you, then this might be a sign that he wants to move forward in his life without the baggage of the former relationship.

Again, the situation isn’t necessarily bleak, just that it isn’t always an easy fix.

When did he tell you to move on with your life? The length of time after a break up happened can also be a factor in how much weight can be put into a statement.

If it was really soon after, within a few weeks, then there is still a chance that he was being emotional and may not have been 100% sold on that as a path forward. If it has been months and then he said to move forward, you should take that as gospel, and prepare to move on without him.

If it is the latter, why can you not move on after many months, or even over a year? What is the lack in your life, which is preventing you from finding new experiences or relationships? Sometimes, things have simply run their course, and we need to face up and change with the times.

Also, it is important to recognize the context in which he told you to forget about getting back together. Was it after a bout of you begging?

Be honest, were you bothering him with too many text or calls? Was it damn near harassment? Or was it said in some other context?

Read the Tea Leaves

If he is constantly ignoring your texts or calls or other overtures of trying to communicate with him about getting back together…then you should respect his wishes and back off from pursuing for the time being.

Especially, if he is verbally telling you to leave him alone and that you need to move on. Continuing to chase is just going to make an ex-boyfriend’s opinion of you sour even more than it already has.

He needs his space to live his life and you need yours to heal emotionally and figure out what the right course will be for your future.

Plus, that sort of constant bombardment of messaging and pleading, is going to do nothing but push him further away. At least, if he has space, he might eventually change his mind. But how can he do that with a constant reminder, of reasons why he broke up with you?

If after taking stock of your own situation, it seems highly unlikely that a reconciliation is going to take place, there needs to be an acceptance of the facts.

I know that it is difficult to do and that emotions can be running high but reality always needs to be faced. Can a new relationship be formed at some point?

Sure, it’s just that it probably won’t happen in the near term. As such, one should begin to move forward with their lives as if it isn’t going to happen, and welcome the new opportunities that life presents.

Yes, it isn’t easy to deal with all of the time, but it is a necessary part of life. Experiencing the lows, makes the highs of love and relationships that much better.

Plus, often after a break up once perspective on the past is achieved, it becomes clear that it really wasn’t the best situation for you to be in.

Ultimately, the responsibility for being ‘happy’ or ‘content’ with one’s life falls on the individual. You cannot outsource your happiness and self-worth to someone else and expect things to last.

If you rely on someone else to make you ‘feel happy’, it will always end in disappointment. As soon as they change their mind, your happy feelings go down the drain.

Remember, that whether it is this guy or any other guy in the future, he is supposed to enhance your life NOT make it. That inner strength and contentment is the first goal to achieve. Only from that can you begin to have truly healthy and satisfying relationships.

Otherwise, you just end up with really co-dependent messes. So, in the process of moving on, focus on yourself. Not only how to make the external life better, but especially how to find a stable inner peace, instead of an up and down emotional roller coaster.

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Would You Want Him Back?

OK, aside from all of the emotional turmoil and feelings of loneliness, that are happening right now…would you honestly want to get back together?

Was the relationship really going that well or have so few problems that it was worth salvaging? A relationship cannot be one-sided and succeed, so even if you wanted him back and he was questioning it or indifferent, it would be doomed to fail once again.

The most recent break up is usually the worst but have you had other ones in the past? Honestly, how much time do you spend thinking about guys you may have dated, when you were younger?

Because the wounds are fresh from the recent break up, it tends to make it seem like you really do want him back when in fact, your emotions are masking what would be the best move for you.

So, honestly, would you actually want him back? If he isn’t the right one for the type of relationship that you want in your life, then the answer should be a clear no.

You don’t have to settle or grasp at straws because you have a fear of being alone. Take the time to go No Contact and figure out exactly what you want for your life.

But also accept that you have no control on the other person’s actions and what they want for themselves. Sometimes, things just don’t align and the only course of action is moving on.

Simply feeling lonely, isn’t a valid reason for trying to be in a relationship.

Or not knowing what is coming next in your life. So, you instead try to cling to the past. Face it and figure things out, the more time you have under your belt doing this, the clearer things become.

A relationship is also not a way to try to hide some personal problem, that you don’t want to face.

Any of these reasons, and an assortment of others, are not good reasons for trying to be in an already broken relationship. There needs to be some point in time, in which you come to terms with the responsibility of having to carve your own path, with or without them.

If you dig deep and find that you are trying to get back together with him, for any of the wrong reasons, it’s best to just heed his advice and move on.

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My Ex-Boyfriend Moved On So Fast

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There are occasions in which a break up happens and one party is quickly onto someone else while the person they were formerly dating is blindsided and still stuck in a confused state. How did this happen? How can my ex-boyfriend move on so quickly to another woman? Well, there are multiple variations of what your ex can be involved in of course…the rebound relationship (short or long-term), hook-ups with random girls, or something that more resembles a fling with one lady in particular.

Naturally, regardless of the type of relationship that he is engaged in, it can still feel awful seeing someone you were up until recently so close with, off with someone else.  How could your ex-boyfriend get together with someone so fast? How is he moving past the breakup with such rapidity, while you may still be hurting? What does it mean?

Understanding Timing

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

There is a common strategy for men to get over their ex-girlfriend and it involves seeing other women. Now, this could be multiple short-term hookups in order to help forget the void in their lives, left by the end of the relationship. On the other hand, a man can also at times make a lateral move right into another long-term relationship.

In the first case, it usually isn’t serious nor is it something they will probably be pursuing for very long. Sure, having multiple women may be fun for a while, but it can get old really fast. It’s much less about anything those women actually offer and more about helping to heal the void felt. Essentially, trying to move on from commitment by indulging in a complete lack of it.

In this latter case, there is a high chance that he already knew and had already explored making this move into being with this other girl. She might have been someone he had met and liked while the relationship was still in tact, but kept around in case things went south.

In some cases, it might have been a woman he met around the time that he was considering a break up, and she just made the transition that much easier for him to deal with.

So while it seems like a quick move after a breakup, it might have been building for months, and so when the break does happen…it’s easy to slide right over to the other person. I do think that this scenario is more common with women, as they can attract men much easier, than the reverse; but it still does happen.

Sometimes, this type of relationship is serious, and sometimes the other woman acts sort of like an aid to help stave off feelings of lonelinessThere is almost always a great void left behind in the aftermath of a breakup and different people will find different ways to try to cope with that.

It may be in the arms of someone else or going out and trying to hookup with a bunch of women to take the focus off of the one that was just lost. It can often have much less to do with you, than them just trying to get their head straightened out.

Consider Moving On

In the immediate aftermath of a breakup and seeing an ex move on to someone else, the shock and emotional pain, can have us solely focusing on him.

However, it is during this period of time, when we need to shift the attention solely to ourselves, and our well-being.

Begin to think about what you would honestly want to change about this situation. If you could snap your fingers and have him back, would you even want to?

I mean, would it actually be something desirable or just a temporary fix for the emotional tumult you currently feel? Obviously, the relationship had problems, what would be fixed? How serious would things be long-term, if he moved on with someone else, this quickly?

While break ups hurt, they aren’t necessarily a bad thing at all. They can help us move forward from one stage of our lives to another. One person can be a great fit at one time, but a few years later, and it just no longer works. We grow apart, people end up wanting different things from life, etc.

These transitions aren’t pleasant, but once we work on letting go of the past and gain clarity about what we do want, we can realize a blessing in disguise.

I’ve had this very scenario happen to me once when I was younger. A girl that I was seeing, almost immediately got together with another guy, and it turned out to be a serious long-term relationship.

Now, at the time, this made me feel miserable. However, once the months had started to pass, I gained more clarity about things. Once the years, had passed, it no longer effected me. Heck, I was glad that it happened, because the relationship had a bunch of issues, which I had ignored.

Had we stayed together, it would’ve been a disaster, at some point. I would have been even more unhappy and be in a completely different space in my life. Probably, a worse one. For these sorts of reasons, we have to make sure to take care of ourselves in the short-term during this emotional storm, until it passes and we know things worked out.

Is It Serious?

Perhaps but then again, the rebound relationship might not be serious at all. It could just be a temporary ‘fix’ to help cope with a major change in one’s life.

If he is seeing multiple women, then of course he isn’t serious about any one girl. However, he might be ‘serious’ about making that his new lifestyle, having multiple women around at any given time. Most of the time, it will be a short-lived phase, but some guys go all in on this type of thing.

In that case, he might want to explore that route for a while and not even be open to anything serious with any other girl. He is in no rush to be in a committed relationship and so will resist any overtures towards that.

If he is involved with one girl, it can be serious. It depends on many factors, such as how long that they have been together and how long your relationship with him was.

However, being together with one girl only isn’t necessarily an indicator of seriousness either. He might not have any other options to date or he might not like being with multiple women at once. Again, it varies from person to person but taking a wait and see approach can help you to figure out what the deal is exactly.

On your end, the key is to not let this ‘moving on’ by the other person, take hold of your life. Learn to cope, grow, and deal with the breakup in a healthy manner. Don’t get dragged down or become despondent just because he is seeing other people. Here is an article to help with that: How to Move on From an Ex