Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back

Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back After You Cheated On Him?

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In the course of some relationships, cheating and infidelity can happen. Sometimes, you are on the receiving end of it, while other times you are the one who cheated. If you find yourself in the latter situation, it can be quite a difficult place to start again from. This violation of trust can quickly put an end to even the longest term relationships and can destroy any chances of reconciliation even when both parties still love one another a lot. In this post, I want to explore a bit on the possibilities or techniques for getting back together with your ex-boyfriend when you were the one who cheated.

 

Forgive Before Seeking Forgiveness

So, you’ve cheated and your boyfriend dumped you as a result. The first step before even considering your chances to get back together with him is to fully accept the mistake you made and forgive yourself. I know that in this situation, you can really feel bad about what you did and continue to carry around guilt about it. However, if you are going to move forward with your life, either with or without your ex-boyfriend, you need to come to terms with it internally.

This is easier said than done, obviously, but it is possible when you let go of the past and the emotions which have arisen from it. You cannot alter the past, just as you cannot alter the future and guarantee that your ex is going to take you back and absolve you of your relationship sins. Work out the emotional guilt. Figure out why you really cheated. Was it a fit of passion? Did it stem from a lack of fulfillment with your ex-boyfriend? Even if the two of you got back together would it be a good relationship or would you still be unsatisfied? Would he hang the fact that you cheated over your head, even after taking you back? These are the types of things you need to come to terms with before deciding if it is a good idea or not to try to reconcile.

 

Time Apart is Time to Heal

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We need some time apart…

Following the No Contact Rule post-breakup is a good idea because it gives both people a time to breathe and learn to live again without that other person impeding on their emotions. If you cheated, then there is a good chance that your ex isn’t speaking to you at all anyways. Don’t lose it over this fact, just respect their wishes at this time and don’t continually pester them with text and phone messages begging for forgiveness. This period will usually last 30-60 days and is necessary to let things cool off and for those strong emotions to calm down a bit. During this time apart, realize that no matter what one does, sometimes getting back together with an ex isn’t an option and prepare yourself to move forward in life, as a wiser person.

Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.

Understand that, your ex is probably furious with you, so even with your apologetic and good intentions…they probably don’t want to hear from you at all at the moment. Begging can sometimes be flattering (very rarely) but it is mostly a turn off to people. At some point, it becomes kind of pathetic and it’s really unattractive to have someone lowering themselves and trying to suck up to you. Think about guys in the past, who have tried to get with you…were you all that attracted to the obsessive types who damn near worshiped you? Probably not. You were probably drawn to the mentally stronger and more confident men, it’s the same principle at work here.

 

What Needs to Change?

 

make dem changes

make dem changes

 

Okay, so you’ve screwed up royally and cheated on your ex. Now what are you going to do different in the future? In order for your ex-boyfriend to want to get back together with you, he must know that you have changed as a person and that he is going to be able to rebuild a level of trust with you. That same unquestioning level of trust may indeed be gone for good, however, a very high level of trust can be rebuilt but it has to be earned and it takes time. The first step is to accept the blame for what you did, come to terms, and assure that it isn’t going to happen again.

Again, this goes back to what triggered the cheating? If you just hooked up with some guy you thought was hot because you had a momentary weakness, how are you going to make sure that this isn’t going to happen ever again? Are you satisfied with your ex-boyfriend physically and sexually? If the answer isn’t a definitive and unwavering yes, then you should probably just move on with your life. Apologize to your ex if you want, but it isn’t fair to get back into a relationship with someone you don’t have those kinds of feelings for at a high level. It’s okay to want something else in life, even if it is difficult to get past the attachment and emotions that stem from this broken relationship, but it is necessary for both parties to be happy in the long term.

Did you cheat because of something that he did or didn’t do (not enough attention, etc.)? If this is the case, then is he going to change if the two of you were to get back with one another? Or is it something about you that is just being unreasonable or needy? What can you work on about yourself to eliminate the urge to cheat? Was it alcohol or substance related? Are you out partying too much and that opened the door for you to have an opportunity to give in to temptation?

Figure out why you cheated, the things/situations that enabled you to cheat, and demonstrate that you have changed. Also, this clearly means ending whatever type of relationship you had with the person you cheated on your ex-boyfriend with. You cannot have a relationship with that person moving forward if you want your ex-boyfriend back in your life. As such, you have to make a decision to cut them out of your life in order to reconcile.

Figure Out What You Want With Him

So, you have to ask yourself, what you want long term with your ex-boyfriend? If the two of you were to get back together, where is it ultimately heading? If it’s a complete certainty that you are in it for the long haul and he’s the one you want to be with (marriage or other long-term arrangement wise), then it makes sense to at least try to work things out.

If on the other hand, you’re unclear about what you want with him or you’re just feeling really lonely right now or you’re still feeling like you might want to be with other guys…then it is time to prep to move on with your life.

If you fall in the former camp, you have to realize that the relationship as it once was it effectively over. A reconciled relationship is a new relationship and it will take lots of work and alterations in order to get things right the second time around. Now, you of course can’t always get the other person to agree to want to come back. Who can blame them? They are probably devastated by what took place and may no longer have the room or the desire in their hearts to want to see you again. That’s a possibility which must be accepted.

 

What’s the first move?

Obviously, in order to attempt to re-start a relationship, contact has to be reestablished with your ex. With all of the technology we have at our disposal today, perhaps, text messaging is the most logical choice to reach out to an ex once again.

Think about it:

  • They don’t have to agree to meet you face to face right away.
  • That message can sit on their phone until they are ready to respond. More time equals a greater chance.
  • You can craft the right message to them.
  • It’s a private and personal way of communication.

Here is relationship expert Michael Fiore. explaining texts as a form of communication for relationships:

Hopefully, you took the opportunity to download the two free reports towards the top of the post, that help to lay out some of the dos and don’ts of texting your ex. Both of which were written by Mr. Fiore as an introduction to his “Text Your Ex Back”.

Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of shows including Rachel Ray’s to discuss his methods for romance.

Here is what some of Text Your Ex Back’s users had to say about their success with the program:

“Not only did this program change my relationship with what i feel is the most incredible and unique girl i have met so far in my life, but you actually helped me change my life for the better. Ever thought this could be a life changing event for someone? Not to mention how inexpensive and how user friendly the program is, no amount of money or words could express how truly grateful i am for what you have done for me as a man. And for that i would just like to say…Thank You!”- Matthew R.

“My ex was almost begging me to take him back” I love your program ! It’s so much worth it !! My ex came to me yesterday and was almost begging me to take him back !!! Just as you said it !! :D Thank you Michael !!!

“Hi Mike. Good program. The 30 days of no contact was crucial – helped work through myself, thoughts and feelings and work on my physical side – mind body and spirit. The “I like myself” exercise is extremely insightful as it reminds ourselves of who we are. My ex and I are giving at another go – small steps but all great journeys start with small steps. Talk was the game opener – being in our 50’s we did more talking face to face than texting but adapted some of the principles in this program. Thanks for helping me find myself first so I could have the opportunity to find my ex.”- Paul

If you are serious about wanting to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee:

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Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back

Should I Take My Ex Boyfriend Back After He Hurt Me?

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At some point in the time period after a breakup, questions can begin to rise internally about what your next move should be and even if you should accept your ex-boyfriend back into your life.  This can be a confusing time filled with distraught and severe loneliness, that often times causes one to look for the quickest fix to help themselves feel ‘normal’ again. It is during these emotional crises, that we can make bad decisions based off of what we feel instead of what is the right choice for us to make. Should I take my ex back? Is he really that bad of a guy? He can change, right? And a whole host of other questions cloud our minds and effect our judgement. One of these questions could be, “Should I accept him back into my life, after he hurt me?”

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So You’ve Been Hurt…

The most basic advice that I would start with is whether your ex hurt you physically or emotionally or both. If physically, the answer of if you should get back together is a clear, no! If that’s your situation it may be advisable to seek counseling and weaken the feelings of dependency you have towards him and simply move on with your life.

If on the other hand, this guy only hurt you emotionally, you may want to consider the depth of that hurt and what about his character allowed him to scar you in this way. Now, emotional hurt can be as bad and sometimes worse than that of the physical. It is a deep-seated pain that comes into your life when someone who is that close to you, does something to betray your trust or intentionally tries to hurt your psychologically. So, it is important to get to the root of this pain and determine the severity of it.

Did He Cheat?

Some people have open relationships and that’s fine. However, for the vast majority of people, there are clearly understood boundaries of monogamy that once crossed usually spell the end of a relationship. If this is the situation which you are currently mired in, I think the best course of action is not to get back together with him.

Ask yourself, what has changed? Is he suddenly not going to make the same mistake again? Will you be able to accept the fact that he cheated and not let it affect your reconciliation? The relationship has fundamentally changed, so even if the two of you do decide to get back together, is it a situation in which the two of you can grow stronger together? Answer honestly about why you would even want to be with someone who cheats on you in the first place? Dependency and not having a clear option to replace him are not acceptable answers.

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What are His Intentions?

Another determining factor that you should consider, if you are thinking about taking him back is why he wants you back (if he does). Did he honestly realize he’s made a mistake and is actively trying to change and make things better? Or is it more of a case that he currently has no other girls to date, feels lonely, and his attachment to you is strong enough to make him want you (at least for the time being)?

Post-breakup can be a confusing time for him as well. He may be convinced that he wants to be back together with you, even if, deep down he truly doesn’t. Take what he says with a grain of salt and pay attention to his actions. Whether or not he follows through with what he says he’ll do is extremely important. Also, even if he does, that is no guarantee that you should take him back either.

What do You Want?

Emotions and loneliness aside, what is it that you want for your life? If it is unclear at this point, don’t jump back into a relationship. An irrational decision can be a costly decision to make and have you ending up being stuck with someone wrong for you for a very long time. You cannot have a successful relationship anyways, if you are not first happy with yourself and have an idea of how you want your life to be in the future.

Can he realistically be a part of those plans? Take the time for yourself, where you can be alone for a while and gain clarity about what you want and how you should proceed. You may come to realize that he is completely wrong for you and there are literally billions of other men on this planet and that some percentage of them would be much better suited for you. I know, I know, meeting people is hard but great ones do come along if you put yourself out there and make the attempt to meet them.

You cannot make a major decision like this from a position of weakness. Emotions will deceive you or bait you into thinking that you are making a solid decision by taking him back, even when that’s definitely not the case at all. Do your due diligence, be happy with yourself, determine where you want to go in your life, determine if he fits with that plan, and figure out if there are much better options for you out there than just getting back in a fallen relationship.

Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

Should I Take My Ex Back After they Cheated?

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A common cause of breakups is infidelity. One partner steps out of the bounds of the agreed upon relationship in order to get sex, attention, or whatever else from a third party. Honestly, cheating is probably the worst cause of the end of a relationship, as it usually produces the most hurt for the person who got cheated on. However, when some time passes after finding out about the infidelity, your ex might come crawling back to you and be begging for you to get together with them again. Your resolve might be really tough at first and you can resist the initial advances but some doubt starts to creep in and you may begin to wonder if you should indeed accept them back into your life as a lover.

 

What’s the Right Answer?

My policy has always been that I will not accept fixing things between me and a girl who cheats. That’s it. I can forgive and quickly let it go, but unless we had some sort of open relationship agreement, cheating is immediate grounds for the termination of a relationship.

Now, having said that, this may not be the correct answer for your particular situation. Some couples can work through something like that, however, I think that for most people the mistrust would linger on in some part, even after they worked things out.

 

What to Consider

In the vast majority of cases, you shouldn’t take back someone who cheats on you. I would strongly urge you to deal with the loneliness you may feel in the short term and move on from the wreckage of that relationship into a new phase of your life. Having said that, maybe you’re hell bent on making it work, but I would take some of the following things into consideration first.

Can You Realistically Get Past This?

It takes much more than simply forgiving a person, you also have to let it go, and not let it interfere with your future relationship. Understand that: the relationship, you once had is now over. So, if you do decide to take back a cheating ex, it’s like starting from scratch. Does them cheating really bother you? Is it going to continue to hinder your ability to trust them in the future? Are you just hanging on because they are currently your best option for a relationship or are they truly the right person? Would someone who is truly ‘right’ for you, even cheat on you in the first place? If all of this, is too much to handle and cope with then the correct course would be to move on.

What Really Has Changed?

It isn’t enough for someone to say that they’ll change their behavior. Hell, everyone says they’ll change bad habits on New Years’ also and we all know how well that works out for the majority of them. Knowing them as you do, what do you honestly think they are going to change about themselves in order to make things work? You have to be honest with yourself about what you want for your future and if this person is even capable of fulfilling what you want in a relationship.

It won’t be a pretty sight if a few months down the line, your partner starts feeling comfortable with their place in your life and then starts to resort right back to the same habits and infidelities which caused the split in the first place.

Is This More About Dependency than Your Self-Respect?

We can really get attached to the person we are in a relationship with and that’s what makes being in love so great. Sometimes though, that attachment becomes a dependency with drug like effects on our lives, moods, and behaviors. Post-breakup can be a really confusing time, even if it’s clear that they hurt you badly. You may really feel that you want them back or that you actually need them in your life but this can often just be a fear of change in your life and a complete dependency on that person.

If they cheated on you, do they honestly respect you? I mean, on some levels I’m sure they do, but do they respect you completely? Do you respect yourself? Do you love yourself? If you are wishy washy on any of these questions then I would once again say, move on with your life. You need to be able to love yourself and recognize what you want and deserve in a relationship. Dependency and addiction is not a recipe for a healthy relationship, especially when someone can clearly violate the trust of the other.

Should you get back together with an ex that cheated on you? I say no and hope that you consider your situation carefully.

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Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back with Text Messages?

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With the advent of mobile technology, communication among people has never been easier. This can be a really good thing for the most part but like anything else in life it can have its downsides. For one, text message technology can make it very easy to come off as desperate or needy when talking to the opposite sex, this a big problem, especially when it is your ex-girlfriend you are trying to communicate with. If it is easy to seem desperate through text messaging, could one avoid that pathetic label, and use text to get an ex-girlfriend back? Sure, but it would have to be done right and be understood that it might not work at all.

Is it the Right Time to Text Your Ex?

One of the biggest issues in terms of rekindling a relationship is not letting enough time pass before attempting to get things start up again. Time is important because it allows the dust to settle and for both parties to move on somewhat with their lives to explore what they truly want. When you first break up with someone, the emotion can be overpowering and can override any logic or clarity you may have about the situation. Meaning, you may feel like you want her back now and truly believe that, but with time and proper perspective you will realize that she wasn’t really the best choice for your life moving forward.

People can be great in our lives during certain periods of time and then be completely wrong as we live, learn, and grow as people. That’s perfectly natural and yes it can be scary to let someone go when you don’t really know where you’re heading yourself. However, it is sometimes necessary to change and clinging on to a relationship can have bad consequences in the long term.

So, before any type of plan can be put in place to try and get an ex back, one must first come to terms with their emotions and gain clarity on their life. One must be sure without clouded judgment that getting the ex-girlfriend in your life again is exactly what you really want to do. This is why taking time to heal and doing a period of no contact is so important.

Here are some posts to help figure things out:

Ex Back or Move On Main Page

How to Deal with Loneliness Post-Breakup

Getting Over a Relationship

 

For those who have taken the time to consider things and still want to press forward, here is a program that walks you through how to get your ex back through text messaging step by step:

Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of shows including Rachel Ray’s to discuss his methods for romance.

Here is what some of Text Your Ex Back’s users had to say about their success with the program:

“Not only did this program change my relationship with what i feel is the most incredible and unique girl i have met so far in my life, but you actually helped me change my life for the better. Ever thought this could be a life changing event for someone? Not to mention how inexpensive and how user friendly the program is, no amount of money or words could express how truly grateful i am for what you have done for me as a man. And for that i would just like to say…Thank You!”- Matthew R.

“My ex was almost begging me to take him back” I love your program ! It’s so much worth it !! My ex came to me yesterday and was almost begging me to take him back !!! Just as you said it !! :D Thank you Michael !!!

“Hi Mike. Good program. The 30 days of no contact was crucial – helped work through myself, thoughts and feelings and work on my physical side – mind body and spirit. The “I like myself” exercise is extremely insightful as it reminds ourselves of who we are. My ex and I are giving at another go – small steps but all great journeys start with small steps. Talk was the game opener – being in our 50’s we did more talking face to face than texting but adapted some of the principles in this program. Thanks for helping me find myself first so I could have the opportunity to find my ex.”- Paul

If you are serious about wanting to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee:

300x250_txb_02

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Stop Being Needy Post-Breakup

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Here is an interesting and helpful video presentation for guys to deal with their neediness before dating.  After a break up, it can seem like you just cannot get your confidence back or deal with loneliness. In order to successfully move on or even just learn to live without your ex before deciding whether or not to get back together with them, it is important to learn how to date other women.