A break up occurs and sometime afterward, you find out that your ex-girlfriend is involved with another guy, and she has entered the so-called rebound relationship. While this can come as a shock and indeed lower the odds of getting back together, things aren’t always lost. Even with this new development, as a man, you have to remain level headed and figure out what you want. Do you actually want her back or are you just in a temporary emotional state? If yes, do you actually want to go through the whole process of getting her back? What can be done?
Determining the Why and the If
The first thing to consider before embarking on trying to reclaim an ex from a rebound relationship, is to determine the why and the if.
What’s that mean?
Ask yourself, why do you want your ex back?
Then determine, if you really do want to chase her based on that answer.
I know it may seem self-evident based on the fact that you are reading this post, that you do indeed want to pursue patching things up with your ex-girlfriend. However, our mind can often be clouded by the fact that we want something or someone, while totally ignoring the underlying reasons behind that desire.
Is it really about wanting her or is it just not wanting to see her with someone else? It’s fine, if the answer is that you just feel jealousy (we all do from time to time), but that isn’t a sufficient reason to try and rekindle a relationship.
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Is about her or is it about you not feeling so great after the break up? Again, a lot of people try to get back together with someone for the wrong reasons. They start to feel empty or not liking where their life is at, after the end of a relationship. Again, these feelings are normal and can be worked through BUT they are not reason enough to chase after a girl.
Your ex may now be seeing another guy and you want to win her over to you because you have some fear that she may like being with him more than you. A lot of this kind of stuff is simply ego. It comes with not being able to accept how life changes and how it actually is now, you can’t stand losing because you perceive that your value as a man is lowered. Basically, equating getting your ex-girlfriend back with proving your self worth. This is a very unhealthy way to look at things and can lead you to do things such as meddling in her current relationship or trying to drive a wedge between them. Don’t be desperate. Learn to be on your own and be happy on your own before deciding if you should try to spark things anew with her.
There are so many other factors to consider, such as, what a new relationship with her is going to be like. Yep, it will be a new relationship, and cannot continue as it had before between you two. After all, that one failed. So what’s going to be different this time around?
Also consider, getting her back could take time, a lot of time. She is with someone else and in all likelihood, isn’t just going to ditch him on a whim now that you feel like getting back together. This could be a long wait and one with no actual payoff. She might have zero interest in getting back together. There is no guarantee when dealing with humans, particularly when strong emotions are involved.
Once one has considered why they are wanting to still pursue an ex, the question then becomes, if they actually do want to put forth the effort.
As stated above, it takes time, and you must determine if all of the time invested in pursuing this path will yield a better result than just moving on with your life and seeing other women. Add to the fact that once she starts seeing someone else, the odds of getting back together are lower and often damn near not a chance of happening. This isn’t to say it can’t happen but it’s not an easy thing.
What is certain about such a situation is that chasing after the girl, obsessing, and making bold declarations of love is not the path to take. It only serves to make a man look desperate (which is inherently unattractive) and will most likely repel them further away from you. Taking the opposite tact and focusing on improving your own life and allowing new girls to flow into it is the best course of action to take? Why? Well, not only will it help you cope and move on without her, it will also raise your perceived value. So, on the off chance in the future your ex-girlfriend wants you back she will see that you can indeed survive and thrive without her.
Plus, if things don’t work out, you’ll be in a damn good position with plenty of other options. It’s a supply and demand sort of effect. Raise your perceived value and more girls (including an ex) will be attracted to you.
Sometimes, her attraction towards you is still high, and just having other women around draws her in and makes her reach out to you first. I’ve had this happen a few times, where girls I used to date have either seen me out with other girls, in pictures with other girls, or just even out having fun with a group and then suddenly they started trying to get my attention again.
Beyond that, if you currently are in chase and text her all of the time mode…stop it. Do a period of No Contact, in order to help reset things and give you some space away from one another fully. Things need to cool off and emotions need to settle down.
After the no contact period is over, usually a month or a little longer, then can begin the attempts at re-establishing contact, rebuilding some kind of non-romantic relationship with her, before going for the complete recovery of dating once again.
What’s the first move?
Obviously, in order to attempt to re-start a relationship, contact has to be reestablished with your ex. With all of the technology we have at our disposal today, perhaps, text messaging is the most logical choice to reach out to an ex once again.
Think about it:
- They don’t have to agree to meet you face to face right away.
- That message can sit on their phone until they are ready to respond. More time equals a greater chance.
- You can craft the right message to them.
- It’s a private and personal way of communication.
Here is relationship expert Michael Fiore. explaining texts as a form of communication for relationships:
Hopefully, you took the opportunity to download the two free reports towards the top of the post, that help to lay out some of the dos and don’ts of texting your ex. Both of which were written by Mr. Fiore as an introduction to his “Text Your Ex Back”.
Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of shows including Rachel Ray’s to discuss his methods for romance.
Here is what some of Text Your Ex Back’s users had to say about their success with the program:
“Not only did this program change my relationship with what i feel is the most incredible and unique girl i have met so far in my life, but you actually helped me change my life for the better. Ever thought this could be a life changing event for someone? Not to mention how inexpensive and how user friendly the program is, no amount of money or words could express how truly grateful i am for what you have done for me as a man. And for that i would just like to say…Thank You!”- Matthew R.
“My ex was almost begging me to take him back” I love your program ! It’s so much worth it !! My ex came to me yesterday and was almost begging me to take him back !!! Just as you said it !! Thank you Michael !!!
“Hi Mike. Good program. The 30 days of no contact was crucial – helped work through myself, thoughts and feelings and work on my physical side – mind body and spirit. The “I like myself” exercise is extremely insightful as it reminds ourselves of who we are. My ex and I are giving at another go – small steps but all great journeys start with small steps. Talk was the game opener – being in our 50’s we did more talking face to face than texting but adapted some of the principles in this program. Thanks for helping me find myself first so I could have the opportunity to find my ex.”- Paul
If you are serious about wanting to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee: