One of the most common phrases or excuses that is used during break ups is one partner telling the other that, “I need space” or “I need time to think”. Now, this can be quite confusing for the guy who is on the receiving end of this phrase, and who is still hoping that his ex-girlfriend will come back to him.
A person saying that they ‘need space’ can actually have many different meanings depending on who it is saying it. So, the question begs, what should I do when my ex asks for this time apart from one another?
Is there actually a path forward or is she just using the space and time excuse, as a ploy, in order to break away more easily?
The Multitude of Meanings
What does it mean to need space? On the very surface level, it can obviously mean that exactly…leave her the hell alone for awhile.
However, it can also mean that they just want space so that they can make a clean break easier to deal with, that they want to see someone else (either in particular or find someone new), or even that they just want to try out some new things in their lives, without having to worry about their now ex-boyfriend snooping around.
Needing space can be a good way to let someone go easier, as she doesn’t have to see you all of the time and keep dredging up those old emotions, again and again.
But again, it can just mean she needs time to sort things out in her mind and life. So, don’t freak out about it. Time apart will lead to clarity.
People really can feel overwhelmed by an ex. Perhaps she really does have too much going on in her life right now, to deal with you being around, or trying to reconcile the relationship.
Stress and a deluge of thoughts can put quite a lot of pressure on someone. This is particularly true, during the emotional tumult, following a break up. So, yes, taking time and having space to breathe can be a great idea.
This is something that you need to accept. I know that it can be in our nature as men, to try to fix things by being proactive. That isn’t always the best course of action. Sometimes, we need to fall back, and let things settle down before trying to rebuild things with our ex-girlfriend.
Need more help? Click here to receive two free reports: “3 Toxic Texts You Should NEVER Send Your EX” and a mapped plan of the “Text Your Ex Back” process.
Does This Mean That I Should Keep Talking to Her, If She’s Trying to Make It Easier to Let Me Go?
No! Despite what she may have meant, you have no way of know what she meant exactly. As such, the best course of action is to take her at her word and give her space.
Constantly begging her to come back or to even just talk to you is not only annoying, but it is also inherently unattractive. It makes you seem like you have no life or thought independent of her, which is unappealing to her, regardless if it is true or not.
Her needing space is healthy. She needs to stop being sick of being around you and work through her life/emotions. Let her be.
Think about someone annoying pestering you and you just want them to stop. It’d be pretty annoying, right? That’s the place you find yourself in right now, with the ex.
Now, this is temporary. Moods change, people’s mind gets clear, and they learn what they want over time. However, if you’re interrupting this temporary state, she could very well push you away even further.
And that’s definitely not what you want.
Will She Ever Come Back?
There’s no guarantee either way. Individual circumstances may vary and while she may still love you, she might not want to be together with you any longer.
It’s just the way the relationship game works. It can be almost impossible sometimes to win back a person who has truly fallen out of love. However, there are other relationships which end for other reasons and those can have a decent chance of being rekindled.
While the odds vary depending on the circumstances involved, they can be further altered by the actions that you take post-breakup.
So, that means if she wants time to herself and space to herself, that is something you have to respect. Not only for her own benefit but also for your own and whether or not things may eventually worked out between the two of you.
In the end, yes, there’s still a chance that she’ll come back after this break in time. Just give yourself the best odds of making it happen.
Give Her Space, Go No Contact for a Time
Her having space is not a punishment to you. It is an opportunity for the both of you to get out from under the baggage of the now defunct relationship.
This isn’t a time to pine over her and obsess over the notion of the two of you getting back together.
Instead, utilize this time to focus on yourself and your own interests. With time apart, it isn’t uncommon to find out that in reality, you don’t actually want to get back with your ex-girlfriend.
Many times, guys discover that most of what they were ‘missing’ about her, was just the powerful emotions that get stirred up in the post-breakup period.
Take this period to follow the No Contact Rule. Give her that space but also give it to yourself and focus on getting yourself together emotionally.
Prepare to move on from the relationship mentally, even if a reconciliation is still a possibility in the future. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.
No Contact will usually last for 30-45 days. After that amount of time has passed, you can try to reopen the lines of communication with her.
Sometimes, she’ll come back sooner. In that case, her needing time alone, was short lived. That’s fine, but don’t go overboard with pouring out your heart to her, as soon as she’s ready to talk.
Take it slower. Gradually build things up with her again. Then, the two of you can work on the problems that the relationship had, or agree to go your separate ways. Depending on what your case calls for.
What Comes After No Contact?
Hopefully, you took the opportunity to download the two free reports towards the top of the post, that help to lay out some of the dos and don’ts of texting your ex.
Both of which were written by Michael Fiore as an introduction to his “Text Your Ex Back”. Michael is a relationship expert who’s been written about, been featured on TV, and the like.
He also recommends a period of no contact with an ex. His guides, also show how to both work through the time apart, and how to decide what to do next.
If you want further help working out things or really do want to make things work with an ex, this is something you’ll want to check out.
Text Your Ex Back is a full mp3 audio and ebook program which has helped thousands of people reignite things with their exes by following Michael Fiore’s advice. He has been on a number of shows including Rachel Ray’s to discuss his methods for romance.
Here is what a Text Your Ex Back user had to say about their success with the program:
“Not only did this program change my relationship with what i feel is the most incredible and unique girl i have met so far in my life, but you actually helped me change my life for the better. Ever thought this could be a life changing event for someone? Not to mention how inexpensive and how user friendly the program is, no amount of money or words could express how truly grateful i am for what you have done for me as a man. And for that i would just like to say…Thank You!”- Matthew R.
If you are wanting to try to get back with your ex, please click the image below to watch a free video and try “Text Your Ex Back” with a full 60 day money back guarantee:
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